hysterics....goes practical.....and need a change(Radical)

and..goes has finally listened to me...this time its like magic..and for the last time i m sharing something to outer world..and after this post i will shut down this blog...

as i told..and the regular visitors know that i again did something which turned her off..now what?

yes..after trying hard...i decided to give it a try one more time...and night before doing that, i prayed hard to god, saying..give me last chance..and i wont ask for a another as i w ont do anything which can again take me back to grave. and as a miracle, next day..something persuaded me, off course i am obsessed with her, and i aproached her again..and she replied..and i opened up myself..evry emotional experiecen i went through since these past weeks..and i want to change for a better..maybe perfect but before that i would try for better...so she wascold in her replies as i feel that she was busy and obviously its not easy for anyone to start over any broken realtion from anywhere..but it was enough for me..i thougth i got my life back..and so i dont want to do anything stupid..so i m looking for a change...a positive change which can bring her to me..in my life forever..and this time i want to give meaning to this word forever..

i want to and i have to restructure my ruptured life..which could be better i nevery terms..i have the resources which i can utilise and then climb to the stirs which can take me to hr..and bring a satisfactions in my family who has been living a stressed life just because of me...its time to commit..to make a commitment to myself ///

its not possible for me to disclose the deatils..but i have start working on it..seems like a fairy tale to me..but i have not other option to make it...its final..it will be "US"...after one year...

please wish that i stay at hard work..and bring back smiles on the faces whom i have stressed a lot..